Saturday, April 16, 2011

Emotional Affair Recovery: 3 Secrets to Help You Heal and Move On After Infidelity



Affairs tear apart marriages, shatter trust and replace confidence with doubt. Getting over an emotional affair is possible despite the feelings you might currently have. You might be feeling hopeless and ask yourself "why me?" and "what did I do to deserve this?"

Externalizing your emotions and trying to figure out what happened is the biggest mistake you can make when trying to heal from an emotional affair. I know it sounds counter intuitive but I'm going to reveal to you 3 powerful secrets you can use to recover from an emotional affair and everything starts and ends with you...

Secret 1

Face your pain. Don't deny the reality of the situation, embrace your pain. I know it sounds backwards and it goes against your natural instincts but you need to get in touch with your pain and the feelings you're going through. It's completely normal if you feel some of these emotions because of the investment you made into the relationship:

  • Betrayal

  • Guilt

  • Disappointment

You're probably going to feel several other emotions as well so try your best to describe them to yourself because it's only when we face our pain that we can begin the healing process. You have to know what emotions you're dealing with so you can cope with them.

Secret 2

Feel your pain. Let your emotions flow freely and don't hold them in. If you feel like crying, then cry. If you hold your emotions in, they will consume your life and hold you captive preventing you from healing properly. Here are just a few things you can do that will help positively release your inner emotions:

  • Talk with a friend

  • Take care of yourself

  • Do Yoga

  • Write a letter

  • Distract yourself

Use these techniques when you feel like your about to be buried by your emotions. Releasing your emotions creates a psychological pathway to healing because you remove the mental roadblocks that prevent recovery.

Secret 3

Surround yourself with positive influences. As time passes, your emotions will calm down, but they won't go away at once. Your life has been left in a mess and now it's time to clean it up. You've already identified your emotions and feelings and now it's time to put things around you in order.

What you need to do now is make 2 lists, the first list will include items and activities that make you happy and bring you pleasure and the second list will be a list of your acquaintances or friends. Now combine the 2 lists to see which of your friends and activities are positive influences on you right now.

If you have some friends that are overly negative when it comes to relationships, put them in a separate column in the activities list and label it "later." Right now you need to surround yourself with people and activities that are going to build you up and not bring you down.



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