Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Survive Infidelity In Marriage - 4 Reasons Why You Should Get Help After The Affair



It is a difficult prospect to survive infidelity in marriage - it makes no difference how long you've been married. This will probably be uncharted territory for you, and you will be dealing with a devastating whirlwind of emotions right now.

However, you don't have to deal with this on your own. In fact, it would be beneficial for you and your cheating spouse to get some external help and therapy after the affair. This can be in the form of therapy after affair and other available resources, and I want to give you 4 reasons why you should give therapy after the affair a try:

1. It allows you to develop better communication with your spouse

Without condoning extramarital affairs, one of the reasons cheating spouses give for their mistake is that they felt misunderstood and uncomfortable at home. What getting help or participating in therapy will do is provide a platform on which you can have better communication with your partner. After the affair, couples can experience difficulty in communicating and expressing emotions. Therapy can break the communication process into steps, making it more efficient.

2. It serves to give you a fair overview of your relationship

There are usually underlying issues within a relationship which can become magnified when something like an affair happens. Also, after the affair, it can be difficult to see clearly amid the pain caused. But therapy will help you view things more objectively, to see both perspectives in the relationship, and hopefully help both parties understand how they can each contribute to repairing the marriage.

3. It provides a basis of accountability

Any goal is made much more achievable when there is a degree of accountability. And just like someone may need a personal trainer to enforce weight goals, it would be beneficial for you to work with your partner either in therapy after the affair or using available resources. They could provide you with the expertise that you need and the right guidance in order to save your marriage.

4. It serves as neutral place of healing

The situation, right from when the cheating spouse admits his/her mistake or is found out, is a very highly emotionally charged and difficult one. It helps if there is neutral ground or simply ground rules that both spouses will be accountable to, then the cheating spouse can feel like he/she can speak without fear of being confronted unfairly or adjudged harshly and the injured spouse can feel like he/she will get some answers. This will make the whole exercise rewarding and effective.

Even though it is not easy to survive infidelity in marriage, if you really care about saving your marriage and working through the damage dealt to your marriage by an affair, then it is a worthwhile investment of time, money and effort to get help and participate in therapy after the affair.



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