Sunday, April 17, 2011

3 Signs of an Affair



It can be a truly devastating experience to discover that your husband is having an affair. Your mind is flooded with all kinds of haunting images of him with the other woman, you want to know the details of what happened, and you can barely get through the day with all the thoughts that swarm through your mind.

But despite these downsides, sometimes you just need to know the truth. No one wants to be in the dark while their husband is sneaking around behind their back. Here are a few ways that you can tell if your husband is having an affair.

The first thing you want to look out for is any sort of emotional distance between you and your husband. If he is having an affair, chances are good that he feels guilty about it. In order to justify what he's doing he has to put emotional distance between you and him. Maybe you and him just don't talk as much anymore. Maybe the two of you are having more arguments than before. Maybe he just seems to generally resent you.

When someone has an affair it is common for them to see the other woman as "all good" while at the same time viewing their wife as "all bad" in an effort to justify the affair. Your husband emotionally withdrawing from you may come in one of many flavors, but be on the lookout for it.

Secondly, keep your eyes open for any reason he might have to be out of the house more often. If you husband is having an affair, he's going to need to find time to do it. Does he say he's working late? Has he suddenly taken up a new hobby like bowling or golf? These could simply be excuses to get out of the house.

Also take note that if the two of you are having more arguments, there could be a little of the first two points combined. Maybe the arguments help to distance him from you, but while he's angry he leaves the house to "cool off." This may be an excuse to get out and meet up with the other woman.

Third, it's no secret that if he's wooing another woman, it's probably going to cost money. Be on the lookout for unusual charges on the credit card. Maybe instead of getting that sandwich at the deli like he usually does for lunch, you notice a charge for a very expensive restaurant.

Chances are good though that your husband may know that you're going to be checking over the bank records. Instead he might be withdrawing large amounts of money from the ATM in an attempt to cover his tracks. Do his withdraws seem unusually large or frequent?

Affairs can truly be a difficult thing for any woman to deal with. What you discover may not make you feel good, but I think in the long run it is better to know the truth than to merely look the other way and hope for the best.



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